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lazyanimator
04-05-2011, 01:42 AM
Hi Everybody,

I have recently been working on a simple short film. Currently its got a temp sound /audio track. But its on line for a while and would be interested in your opinion...

Its here (flashvideo format):

http://www.unleadedmedia.co.uk/html/jim.html

Thanks,

LA.

lazyanimator
04-06-2011, 09:27 AM
Well thanks for your support. I know its not avatar but I like it.

sammael
04-06-2011, 09:36 AM
I like it as well & I think the audio is pretty amusing as it is...

Musart
04-06-2011, 10:23 AM
Really Nice! Thanks

erikals
04-06-2011, 10:45 AM
very good actually :]

Rabbitpenny
04-06-2011, 10:47 AM
I'm impressed! Part of your lack of responses might be due to the sectionin which you posted. Probably should have been posted in one of the galleries.

The physics of your animation seems very good to me. I liked: the scene where the slug tries to roll the skateboard using his own momentum, the scene where the slug pushes the skateboard up the hill and the scene where the slug hit the tree. I thought all were well done.

That said, the end of the story left me wanting...Maybe have a frustrated slug end up exactly where he started. To paraphrase Lasseter, it's only partly about the animation. It's mostly about the story.

lazyanimator
04-06-2011, 11:16 AM
sammael, thank you!
musart, thank you!
erikals, thank you!

RabbitPenny, thank you too.

I was beginning to feel a little unloved there for a while!

I put it on the web to show a certain tv channel exec, who is obviously so impressed she isnt returning my emails!?! (Why isnt there a smiley icon with a gun against its head....oh the frustration... )

RabbitPenny, I originally had the skateboard hit the tree and then flatten the cr*p out of him. However I am trying to pitch this to childrens Tv, so had to figure out a less horrific ending...lol.

erikals
04-06-2011, 11:20 AM
try local tv channels too...

bazsa73
04-06-2011, 11:32 AM
It made me laugh. Funny stuff. :)

Greenlaw
04-06-2011, 12:28 PM
Well thanks for your support. I know its not avatar but I like it.
Very cute! I can't wait to show it to my four-year-old. I know she'll get a big kick out of it.

And don't sell yourself short; it's a lot funnier than Avatar. :)

G.

jeric_synergy
04-06-2011, 12:43 PM
Very good, I laffed several times. Kudos, well done.

FWIW, YMMV, MOO (my opinion only),I could do with less of the vocalizations, I find them annoying.

The eyes were my favorite part: the gag that the only thing he has to manipulate the world is his eyes was great. If the eyes reacted to the wind a bit (displacement/ world coordinates/ripple texture would make that automatic, use falloff or weightmap to localize to eyes & stalks) when he's descending the hill, that might be a good gag.

That said, the end of the story left me wanting...Maybe have a frustrated slug end up exactly where he started. To paraphrase Lasseter, it's only partly about the animation. It's mostly about the story.
Or cut from his apprehension of the danger, to him moving off with skateboard treadmarks across his body. OTOH, running off to the horizen IS a classic bit.

erikals
04-06-2011, 01:30 PM
the ending was a bit vague i think,... make a good twist,... maybe he finds a one wheeled bike or something... or another ultimate challenge...

Paul_Boland
04-06-2011, 02:38 PM
I love it!! Wish I could do stuff like this.

Rabbitpenny
04-06-2011, 03:37 PM
make a good twist,... maybe he finds a one wheeled bike or something... or another ultimate challenge...

Good ideas, Erikals...I vote for that, Lazy.

halley
04-07-2011, 12:05 PM
And don't sell yourself short; it's a lot funnier than Avatar. :)
G.

And better. I liked it!

lazyanimator
04-07-2011, 02:45 PM
Thanks for all your comments and suggestions. I appreciate all your feedback!


Now if only I could get a tv channel to order 30 of them!

LA.

blugenwitz
04-08-2011, 07:38 AM
Good one.