PDA

View Full Version : Cheesy Techy Jokes Anyone?



BooneHomes
03-24-2010, 10:57 AM
1) Your mom's so fat, her UVs can't fit in a 0-1 space
2) Your mom's so fat, her edge loops can't reach all the way around
3) Your mom's so fat, she used up all the weight paint.

BooneHomes
03-24-2010, 10:58 AM
1)Your mothers so fat I couldn't scale a sphere big enough.
2)Your mothers so fat the view port clipping planes couldn't be set high enough.
3)Your mothers so fat I tried to bake her normals and she ate them instead.

RebelHill
03-24-2010, 11:24 AM
I always liked...

How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

(sin(2x) + cos(2x))

walfridson
03-24-2010, 11:26 AM
mr BooneHomes is a spambot...

RebelHill
03-24-2010, 11:32 AM
mr BooneHomes is a spambot...

well tahts a shame...

the mom/fat/UVs Id actually not heard before... made me laugh my *** off. Ill def be using it on the uninitiated so I can amuse myself with their blank stares.

Shawn Farrell
03-24-2010, 11:41 AM
Your computers so slow, what kind of chip you got int that, a dorrito?:I_Love_Ne

shrox
03-24-2010, 12:22 PM
The lT depatment at Sega had a sign on the door that read "H.M.S. Amistad".

*Pete*
03-24-2010, 01:17 PM
oh...this was one of the funniest spambots out there...cant we get him back?

we could always let him loose in a thread that goes sour... :D

SBowie
03-24-2010, 01:47 PM
Yeah, at least it was marginally on topic ... surprising.

RebelHill
03-24-2010, 01:51 PM
we could always let him loose in a thread that goes sour... :D

Not if he started going...

Ur dev team couldnt even core an apple.

lwaddict
03-24-2010, 02:12 PM
:ohmy:
OMG U DID NOT!!!

Kuzey
03-24-2010, 04:11 PM
Did you just extrude that polygon, or are you happy to see me.....

Kuzey

shrox
03-24-2010, 04:16 PM
He was 64 bit, she was 32,
Nothing more to say except her screen turned blue...

Kuzey
03-24-2010, 04:28 PM
A Newtek staff member walks into a bar and bumps into a person eating a tuna sandwich :hey:

Kuzey

JCG
03-24-2010, 04:29 PM
HR: So what can you tell us about your background?
Me: Oh, it's just the plain grassy hill that comes with Windows.

Kuzey
03-24-2010, 04:43 PM
Why does LW have so many tools that can do the same thing?

Because it can....and it's more fun that way :)


Kuzey

Hopper
03-24-2010, 05:15 PM
CORE walks into a bar....

Bartender says "Hey.. your late. And look at yourself. You're only half dressed."

CORE says "Yeah, and if you give me $395, I'll let you watch me drink your booze."

borkus
03-24-2010, 07:30 PM
Hopper, that was ace!!! I laughed for a few good moments over that...

probiner
03-24-2010, 09:43 PM
CORE walks into a bar....

Bartender says "Hey.. your late. And look at yourself. You're only half dressed."

CORE says "Yeah, and if you give me $395, I'll let you watch me drink your booze."

So for the disapproval tone in these statemments we deduct that CORE is in fact, a man (wow new stuff about CORE)... otherwise you would be happy with an half-dressed subject drinking your booze :D

Chris S. (Fez)
03-25-2010, 12:18 AM
So for the disapproval tone in these statemments we deduct that CORE is in fact, a man (wow new stuff about CORE)... otherwise you would be happy with an half-dressed subject drinking your booze :D

That's a man, baby!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WgOIEGz7o_s

OnlineRender
03-25-2010, 03:53 AM
So you m/\ke 3D Porn ?,cool ............." You use Poser then!"

Kuzey
03-25-2010, 06:20 AM
A LWHC polygon meets a Core polygon and strikes up a conversation.

LWHC polygon: You must be new here, but you look so familiar.

Core polygon: Yeah...I'm a year old and I'm you from the future.

LWHC polygon: Wow..that sound great. So, am I cool in the future?

Core polygon: You're cooler than beans.

LWHC polygon: Do I have female polygons falling all over me?

Core polygon: Na...you're still a nerd.

LWHC polygon: Then, what's so cool about me in the future?

Core polygon: Well, I now come with a history. If a user doesn't like the state I'm in, they can go back through my history and make changes easily.

LWHC polygon: Mmmm...that's doesn't seem that cool.

Core polygon: Well, then there's the polygon count limit you have. In the future it has been lifted, you can have a over a trillion polygons and still be productive and fast.

LWHC polygon: Wow...that's more like it. But what would you do with so many polygons?

Core polygon: All primitives come in default 3 billion polygon count...if you want a prefect high density sphere...you now have it. Low polygons are for losers!

LWHC polygon: What..that sounds excessive. So, what movies have you been in???

Core polygon: None...yet.

LWHC polygon: Why?

Core polygon: Well, even though I'm cooler and more powerful than you, I still can't be used in an effective pipeline. You see, my program is not complete yet and won't be for some time...I'm basically a toy atm.

LWHC polygon: That's bad...how long would it take...before you become useful?

Core polygon: That is not clear...some say in the next version or two, others say much longer. It's a safe bet to presume it will be anything from 2 years to.....to...to...well, maybe 10 years.

LWHC polygon: I think I like me....the way I am now, this future stuff seems so restrictive and slow to me. Man...the future sucks!!

Core polygon: You said it brother!!


Kuzey

Kuzey
03-25-2010, 06:21 AM
disclaimer...that was just a joke and not an attack on anybody :D

Kuzey

Ulven
03-25-2010, 06:43 AM
Q: What does TD stand for? A: Tedious.

Kuzey
03-25-2010, 07:24 AM
Q: What has red banners, yellow text and is grey allover?

A: Mach Newsletter :hey:

Kuzey

OnlineRender
03-29-2010, 02:52 PM
Q: What has red banners, yellow text and is grey allover?

A: Mach Newsletter :hey:

Kuzey

How many Kuzey post's does it take to kill a thread ?




end joke :devil:

Kuzey
03-29-2010, 02:59 PM
How many Kuzey post's does it take to kill a thread ?




end joke :devil:

As much as one can take without getting banned :hey:

Anyway....I'm bored and March is almost over. I'm thinking they'll have something up tonight :goodluck:

Kuzey

Kuzey
03-29-2010, 03:18 PM
Q: What does HC stand for?

A: Any of the following :D

Holy Crap!
Homemade Cookies
Hostile Creation
Head Constable
Head Count
Hard Cover
Hard Copy
Head Coach
Healthy Choice
High Contrast
Happy Couple
Hot and Cold
Head Circumference
Health Costs
Help Contents
Headache Cure
Holding Cell
Hazardous Cargo

Kuzey

Kuzey
03-30-2010, 05:18 AM
Still no newsletter...looks like it's going to be another great edition...with a Core video I hope :thumbsup:

Jay walks into a bar and orders his favorite drink....a Jin & tonic.

Chuck walks into a bar and orders his favorite drink...a Stooch whisky

Kuzey

Hopper
03-30-2010, 09:33 PM
Still no newsletter...looks like it's going to be another great edition...with a Core video I hope :thumbsup:

Jay walks into a bar and orders his favorite drink....a Jin & tonic.

Chuck walks into a bar and orders his favorite drink...a Stooch whisky

Kuzey
Ouch ...

So if either one orders a beer, does the barkeep put it in a Kuzey?

shrox
03-30-2010, 10:07 PM
My dot com 401k came up 404-wealth not found.

danielkaiser
03-30-2010, 11:03 PM
Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar, and doesn't.

shrox
03-30-2010, 11:20 PM
Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar, and doesn't.

Oh, the cat definately walked in, it's a question of whether he has ID or not.

Kuzey
03-31-2010, 06:36 AM
Ouch ...

So if either one orders a beer, does the barkeep put it in a Kuzey?

Lucky....they don't like beer...hehe :D

I thought that was my best one...funny, on topic and not mean.

Kuzey

jrandom
04-01-2010, 11:06 AM
An extruded polygon walks into a bar. The bartender looks at it and says, "say, why the long face?"

shrox
04-01-2010, 12:59 PM
An extruded polygon walks into a bar. The bartender looks at it and says, "say, why the long face?"

Ohhh, good bad!

You know, if you pick at your food it will never heal.

BeeVee
04-01-2010, 02:13 PM
A foo walks into a bar and the barman asks, "What kind of example are you setting?"

B